FACETIOUSLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Q. Isn't this whole website a little elaborate for someone who doesn't plan ever to do more with music than make amateurish little recordings, and maybe one day find some other aging musicians to bang out classic rock tunes on occasional Saturday afternoons?
A. Yes.
A. Yes.
Q. Why do you even keep at it? I mean, you have no pretensions of ever making money at music, you're the first to admit that there's way better music elsewhere - what's the point of spending what has to be a huge amount of time grinding away at a hobby you know will never amount to anything?
A. Because it's what I do. I mean, people write crappy fiction, or build ships in bottles, not because it makes them money, or to build a following, but because it's what they like doing. Guys who spend years building model train sets in the basement aren't doing it in the hope that someday the government will downsize passenger rail and appoint them CEO of HO-Scale Amtrak. They just like trains, and they can't afford the full-size ones. My thing is music. Sure, there are cooler train sets out there; this is just the one that's mine.
A. Because it's what I do. I mean, people write crappy fiction, or build ships in bottles, not because it makes them money, or to build a following, but because it's what they like doing. Guys who spend years building model train sets in the basement aren't doing it in the hope that someday the government will downsize passenger rail and appoint them CEO of HO-Scale Amtrak. They just like trains, and they can't afford the full-size ones. My thing is music. Sure, there are cooler train sets out there; this is just the one that's mine.
Q. So then why should I care?
A. Oh, I'm not suggesting you should. This is just a hobby. I used to make tapes for friends and family; this is just easier. If you ended up here some other way, I just hope I'm not wasting your time.
A. Oh, I'm not suggesting you should. This is just a hobby. I used to make tapes for friends and family; this is just easier. If you ended up here some other way, I just hope I'm not wasting your time.
Q. You keep using the term "progressive," and I take it "prog" is the short form. What does that even mean?
A. Heh. Oh the wars that used to erupt over that question on message boards and email lists in the late '90s. There's no one definition, but as any true prog fan will say, only mine is correct. Key characteristics include experimentation, extended instrumental passages, bonus points for grand themes, long-form compositions, and a focus on superior musicianship. But if you ask me (and, O hypothetical questioner, you just did), the - THE defining component of prog is odd time signatures. Is Tool prog? Oh, hell yeah. Rush? Yes? King Crimson? Yes, yes, duh. Dream Theater, Symphony X - you get the point. Pink Floyd? Well, that's a closer call. But since "Money" is in 7/4 time, and they've got the other ingredients, okay. Then how about grunge? Lots of grunge tunes in odd times - think Them Bones, Spoonman, Outshined, Fell On Black Days - does that count? No. Just 'cause something's in 7, that doesn't make it prog. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
A. Heh. Oh the wars that used to erupt over that question on message boards and email lists in the late '90s. There's no one definition, but as any true prog fan will say, only mine is correct. Key characteristics include experimentation, extended instrumental passages, bonus points for grand themes, long-form compositions, and a focus on superior musicianship. But if you ask me (and, O hypothetical questioner, you just did), the - THE defining component of prog is odd time signatures. Is Tool prog? Oh, hell yeah. Rush? Yes? King Crimson? Yes, yes, duh. Dream Theater, Symphony X - you get the point. Pink Floyd? Well, that's a closer call. But since "Money" is in 7/4 time, and they've got the other ingredients, okay. Then how about grunge? Lots of grunge tunes in odd times - think Them Bones, Spoonman, Outshined, Fell On Black Days - does that count? No. Just 'cause something's in 7, that doesn't make it prog. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Q. How did you even start this whole home-studio thing in the first place?
A. I used to want to get really serious. Form a band. Work like crazy. Cut a demo. Get a record deal. But I could never find other musicians who wanted to do anything like what I wanted to do. They were either fellow miscreants in my orbit, beginners who just wanted to play Smoke on the Water and Back in Black wrong, or music majors who wanted to be the next Al DiMeola and were 2/3 of the way there, who would only have been wasting their time playing with the likes of me. If I wanted to play anything remotely ambitious or original, within the considerable limitations of my own talents and availability, I had no choice but to do everything myself. I bought my first 4-track cassette-tape recorder in 1987, then drum machines, keyboards, basses, microphones - and it was all really fun. Then I got busy with school, and work, and more school, and marriage, and fatherhood, and waaaay more work, and I've just never managed to find my way back into a room with other musicians.
A. I used to want to get really serious. Form a band. Work like crazy. Cut a demo. Get a record deal. But I could never find other musicians who wanted to do anything like what I wanted to do. They were either fellow miscreants in my orbit, beginners who just wanted to play Smoke on the Water and Back in Black wrong, or music majors who wanted to be the next Al DiMeola and were 2/3 of the way there, who would only have been wasting their time playing with the likes of me. If I wanted to play anything remotely ambitious or original, within the considerable limitations of my own talents and availability, I had no choice but to do everything myself. I bought my first 4-track cassette-tape recorder in 1987, then drum machines, keyboards, basses, microphones - and it was all really fun. Then I got busy with school, and work, and more school, and marriage, and fatherhood, and waaaay more work, and I've just never managed to find my way back into a room with other musicians.
Q. And the point of this website?
A. If a tree writes and records music in the forest for 40 years and no one's there to hear it, did it really make a sound?
A. If a tree writes and records music in the forest for 40 years and no one's there to hear it, did it really make a sound?
Q. So if no one visits this website, you cease to exist?
A. Yes.
A. Yes.
